Lack of Support During IVF: When You're Facing It Alone
The Strain of Going Through IVF Alone
IVF brings a whirlwind of emotions, not just for the person receiving the treatment but for both partners. For those who feel unsupported, the emotional side can be particularly draining. Watching your partner go through all the physical challenges, appointments, and stress without receiving the emotional backing you need can make things feel impossible. It’s easy to start feeling like you’re alone in the process, and when that happens, it’s hard to stay positive or hopeful. (Source: Healthline)
It’s also common for one partner to feel that they’re carrying the emotional burden for both, trying to be strong for the other. But without reciprocal support, it can be overwhelming. It can make it feel like you’re fighting the battle by yourself. The lack of emotional connection and understanding can lead to frustration, loneliness, and even resentment.
Why Partners Struggle to Support
Sometimes, the partner who’s not offering support doesn’t know how to. The IVF journey can trigger a range of emotions for both people involved, and some find it hard to express what they’re going through. For one partner, the fear of not being able to help or fix the situation can lead to withdrawing. They may feel powerless or unsure of what to say, thinking that offering support would be pointless or even adding to the stress. (Source: Mumsnet)
For others, it’s simply that they don’t fully understand the emotional toll IVF takes. They may focus on the physical side, like the medical appointments or the procedures, without considering how emotionally draining the process can be. That’s when it’s easy to miss the signals and leave the other partner feeling unsupported.
The Power of Communication
Communication is key when it comes to any relationship, especially during IVF. When partners aren’t on the same page emotionally, misunderstandings can occur. Without an open conversation about how each person is feeling, it’s easy to misinterpret the situation or think that everything is fine. The partner who feels unsupported may hesitate to speak up, thinking they’re asking too much. And the partner who’s withdrawing might not even realize that their actions are leaving their loved one feeling neglected.
What You Can Do
If you’re feeling unsupported during IVF, it’s important to reach out. It’s okay to let your partner know that you need more emotional backing. But don’t forget to take care of yourself as well. If you’re feeling emotionally drained, it’s essential to seek support outside of your relationship. Whether it’s friends, family, or a counselor, having someone to talk to can help you process your emotions and find ways to cope. (Source: Babycenter)
Couples therapy can be especially helpful in these situations. It provides a space to talk openly about the challenges of IVF and how it’s affecting your relationship. A therapist can also help you both navigate the emotional complexities of IVF, teaching you how to communicate better and support one another.
Sources:
Healthline - https://www.healthline.com/health/infertility-experience-of-non-carrying... Mumsnet - https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/infertility/Sick-of-partners-lack-of-support Babycenter - https://community.babycenter.com/how-do-i-deal-with-unsupportive-husband...
