November 2020

The psychology of infertility – a way out of despair

When a couple decides to have a baby, it's a big step in life. However, it is not always only nine months that passes between the decision to conceive and the birth of a child; sometimes this process lasts longer. If you are unable to conceive naturally, assisted reproduction gives you hope. However, IVF may not work first time round. How can you avoid succumbing to despair if your attempts are unsuccessful? 


Stress and pressure are your biggest enemies

If you are unable to conceive naturally and in vitro fertilisation hasn't worked on the first attempt, you shouldn't panic and stress unnecessarily. If you are wondering how to conceive, trying too hard can be counterproductive. Mental well-being is just as important as physical health.

Calculating your window and determining the time of ovulation is essential for conception. However, no-one benefits if a couple's life is dominated by the menstrual calendar and everything revolves solely around conceiving a child. A few failed attempts aren't the end of the world or condemn you to a life without children. If you're really having trouble with your efforts to conceive, you're exhausted from your efforts, or you're starting to have disagreements in your relationship, it's time to find a specialist.

They will give you support and the opportunity to share your problems with someone. Telling your story and getting rid of at least part of the burden that infertile couples carry on their shoulders is very therapeutic. At the same time, you realise that you are not alone in your problem. The therapist or doctor will also advise you on how to handle the situation and gain strength for new efforts.


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Infertility is not a personal failure

Many couples, and especially women, take infertility and the inability to conceive as a personal failure. The main culprit is the modern age, which is focused on performance and success. People who are the last childless people around them often perceive their situation as a mistake and something bad. But this only increases stress and tension, which do not help conception or successful IVF.

Mental blocks and discomfort can cause infertility just as much as physical factors. It does no-one any good if people are trapped in a vicious circle. Sometimes it's even worth trying to leave it be, take a break, recharge your batteries, and then try for a baby again.

Even though infertility is no longer a big taboo in today's world, it is still not talked about much. In addition, childless couples are still quite often criticised by those around them. This is despite the fact that 20% of couples have problems conceiving. It should be borne in mind that this is a condition like any other.


IVF is a solution, but…

Infertility treatment in reproductive medicine clinics is one of the solutions being taken by an increasing number of couples who fail to conceive naturally. Here, too, patience is required. Each attempt at IVF gives women an approximately 35% chance of conceiving. However, many couples forget this and think that they'll be able to look forward to a baby after nine months. In such a case, treatment can have an even greater negative impact on the psyche.


Everyone deals with stressful situations differently and different mechanisms apply to different people when dealing with their difficulties. It is important not to succumb to depression, to be patient, and to ask for help if necessary.



*This article is translated from Czech original to English language by translation agency Marvel, s. r. o.